Navigating Family Dynamics During Thanksgiving in Recovery

Thanksgiving is a special time of love, joy, and family togetherness, but for many people in recovery, it can also be a time of stress and anxiety. Conflicts can flare up during family gatherings, threatening recovery and perhaps even leading to relapse.

By anticipating these conflicts and developing a strategy for handling family tensions, individuals will be in a better position to emerge from the Thanksgiving holiday with their recovery intact. Here are some practical tips for navigating family dynamics and staying true to your recovery goals.

Set Healthy Boundaries

Thanksgiving comes replete with triggers that could cause a craving for drugs or alcohol. Some triggers are situational, such as a gathering at which drugs or alcohol are present. Others arise from conflict, such as arguments among family members about money, lifestyle choices, or politics. Still other triggers are family members themselves, especially those with whom you have conflicts or who previously drank or got high with you.

Setting healthy boundaries to avoid these triggers is essential. As an example, you can arrange to sit with other nondrinkers at Thanksgiving dinner while also declining to engage with those family members who are argumentative. It will likely be tough to be around family who are still drinking, but be candid with them about why you sought help and ask them to be respectful of your recovery efforts. Decline invitations to holiday parties where excessive drinking or drug use may occur.

Communicate with Family

Prior to the holiday, reach out to family members to let them know where you stand with your recovery. By communicating ahead of time, you can potentially avoid any awkward assumptions that you will be drinking during the holidays. Being respectful of your needs, your hosts may change the way they serve alcohol—or perhaps not even serve it at all.

Practice and Encourage Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of living in the moment without dwelling on the past or fretting about the future. You can build mindfulness within yourself by meditating before any family gathering—focusing on your breathing, letting go of negativity, and using all your senses to become more attuned to your environment.

When you are with your family, you can encourage mindfulness in others by gently steering the conversation toward the here and now. If two family members start arguing over a past grudge, ask them to set their conflict aside for the day and focus on the positives of being together for Thanksgiving.

Share the Holiday Chores

Family tensions can arise during the holidays if one person does all the shopping, cooking, and cleaning without any assistance from other family members. If that person is you, don’t hesitate to let others know that you can’t do everything alone this year. Being overwhelmed with work can lead to less sleep, higher stress, and greater anxiety that could potentially trigger a relapse.

If you are not the one hosting Thanksgiving dinner, alleviate the stress for others. Offer to help prepare the meal, set the table, carve the turkey, or any of a myriad of other things that need to be done. With multiple family members pitching in, you’re likely to eliminate stress, build camaraderie, and bring the family closer together.

Prioritize Your Health

Thanksgiving is the start of a holiday season in which we tend to overeat, miss out on regular exercise, and suffer from lack of sleep. Taken together, these unhealthy habits compromise not only physical health but mental health as well. For those in recovery, poor health habits can lead to lethargy and fatigue with a potential for depression and greater chance of relapse.

Redouble your efforts to be healthy by eating well-balanced meals with limited salt and sugar intake. Even Thanksgiving dinner can be healthy if you stick to lean turkey, vegetables like sweet potatoes and green beans, and a small slice of pumpkin pie. After dinner, invite family members for a walk or a game of touch football to offset the extra calories. Continue a regular exercise regimen throughout the holidays, and prioritize getting a good night’s sleep to support your emotional wellbeing.

Stay Busy

Too much downtime during the four-day holiday weekend could tempt you into relapse. Stay engaged with family members by playing board games, going to a movie, attending a holiday concert, or doing other activities to keep your mind off drugs and alcohol.

Navigating family dynamics during Thanksgiving can be stressful for those in recovery, but the effort is worth it. By maintaining your sobriety, you will be better able to enjoy your loved ones and build memories that will last a lifetime.

Beachside Rehab, located in West Palm Beach, FL, can help those recovering from addictions successfully navigate the holidays. Contact our trained admissions counselors at 866-349-1770 to discuss how we can help.

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash